Ahoy, matey! Today be International Talk Like a Pirate Day. So muster up yer rrrr-bonics and tell yer boss he be walkin’ the plank if ye don’t get a bigger cut of that treasure he be hoardin’.
And remember, tonight is the night to tell yer wench, “Arrr, matey, prepare to be boarded.”
Then ye be a special kind of pirate.
Unless she say nay. Then ye be looking at five-to-ten years with a very different kind of pirate.